Topic: 10 Signs that You've gotten TOO LONG W/O SEX >,<

[FerminaDaza]

I was reminded about this Signs after I've red and watch this Story of a Woman Who Prefers a Laundry Basket To her Husband's Penis 

http://www.oprah.com/own-bedroom-dr-laura-berman/The-Laundry-Basket


Anyways,To start the Topic.

When is the last time you’ve gotten lucky? Six months? A year? Because it looks like you’re a little…frustrated. Yes, we’ve all noticed.

Here are ten tell-tale signs that you’ve gone too long without having sex by Brandy Alexander


1. . You start fantasizing about Ugly people.

2. You stare longingly at bananas
Bananas are full of potassium and holy shit you suddenly realize you love potassium. You just want to get so much potassium inside of you, you're like a vitamin commercial. Also, yellow is your new favorite color. Yeah, all big and yellow and smooth. Wow. Bananas are too delicious to sacrifice to the smoothy gods. You want to eat bananas whole. You want to buy a bunch and select the biggest, brightest banana for a snack. God bananas are delicious.

3. Just about anything turns you on
Anything even the sounds of washing machine or dishwasher is hot.

4. You talk about sex all the time.
You can't stop talking about sex because you're never having it. You would have it, you tell your coworker, just about anywhere. You would do it in the supply closet ... Your coworker is weirded out by you. Sorry, you say, but you can't help it. Did you even see that banana in the kitchen?

5. You actually want to hear the graphic details.
What's the best thing about being single, you ask your especially promiscuous friend, digging for dirt. You're disappointed when he talks about his personal freedom and wait patiently for him to get to the good stuff.

6. You have no idea the last time you had sex.
Was it last month? Was it two years ago? The weeks and months are bleeding together. You remember, vaguely, some sort of lotion. Or was it lube? No, it was definitely lotion. You remember because it had a weird smell. Oh wait, that's not right.

7. Your jaw has been clenched for two weeks.
You want to blame your job for the tension headaches, but you know it's been the lack of sex. Your jaw may or may not open. Okay, you know you wear your stress in your upper back, but the wrong body muscles are in spasm. You paid a massage therapist too much funny to work out the knots under your shoulders. The next day, the pain was back. You need a real full-body massage that money cannot (legally) buy.

8. Your fuse is so short that everything makes you ANGRY.
You just yelled at the grocery store cashier because your pitted tomato didn't ring up on sale. But you wouldn't have BOUGHT the tomato if they were FULL FUCKING PRICE. You would go home and smash them yourself, because tomato are stupid for high price. Everything is stupid. This whole grocery store is stupid. You'll just take your bunch of bananas THANK YOU VERY MUCH..

9. You start to cheer on the dogs humping at the dog outside your house.
At least someone's getting lucky. Way to go, Fido. High fives.


10. Reading this list hits too close to home
Now you're horny and ashamed. That's a terrible combination, unless you're into that sort of thing. No one is here to judge you. But perhaps it's time to close down your computer, get off the washing machine and get yourself got. And enough with the bananas and the E.Republic think you're being gross FD-Get Laid !!



 

[dweizz]

ah... para sa mga babae pala... akala ko magiging bading ka na pag wala kang sex sa buhay dahil sa no.2

[TobleRONe]

10. Reading this list hits too close to home

the fact na pinost ito ni TS means binasa nya din ito.  

sapul din si TS. How long has it been?  

[FerminaDaza]

the fact na pinost ito ni TS means binasa nya din ito.  

sapul din si TS. How long has it been?  

ahh ehh, ang kukyutt ng turtles noh Toble ?   

[TobleRONe]

ahh ehh, ang kukyutt ng turtles noh Toble ?   

mas kyut mga guinea pigs ko dito sa bahay 

[namster]

11. You are starting to flirt like a WHORE... Badly needed to be fucked by someone...

[voyager_]

Ts,

malapit ka na uwi...

bananas or coffee?...... ur choice 

[FerminaDaza]

Ts,

malapit ka na uwi...

bananas or coffee?...... ur choice 

H2o .