Topic: Ano unang gagawin ko pag nahuli kong may kabit ang asawa ko?

[keenobserver]

hi! nahuli ko asawa ko na may kabit. details are as follows:
- dati nang hindi sweet at masungit ang asawa ko sa akin. 3.5 yrs married (2009) without baby. ito ay nalalampasan namin dahil mahal pa rin namin ang isat isa dahil tanggap ko naman na ganon siya, pero tuwing nagaaway kami, palagi niya sa akin sinisita ang kulang "DAW" na pagaasikaso dahil hindi siya makuntento. may trabaho ako at ang ineexpect nya na level asikaso ay yung pang-walang trabahong misis. hindi rin siya nakikipagcommunicate at pag natagtatalo kami eh hindi nagsasabi ng problema, kundi tinutulugan lang ako palagi pag gusto kong pagusapan ang sitwasyon (kaya hindi nareresolve ang problem)

then, around May 2012 - natanggap bilang assistant sa trabaho ng asawa ko ang "magiging" kabit pla niya in the future.
simula ng buwan na ito
jul. 29, 2012 - i saw his phone ang since "teki" ako at siya ay hindi, nahuli ko sa phone nya na yung call and text records are deleted from call and mesages menu pero hindi nya alam na nareretrieve yung history. (hindi ko nabasa yung exact messages dahil erased na siya) sa lahat ng texts and calls, siya lang ang deleted. nagtaka ako.
jul 29 pa rin - also checked his facebook, new friend nya yung girl. tapos nakita ko rin na naginstall siya ng instagram at twitter, pero 2 lang ang friends nya, at halatang halata na ginawa niya lng yung account for that flirt girl (FYI, hindi siya mahilig sa fb, instagram, twitter but he exerted effort and made this account) - then, i took videos of these things that i caught from his phone as evidence
jul 30 - i confronted him but he denied that that girl is special to him, para daw akong tanga eh bata lang naman daw iyon. and when i told him na "nagsisinungaling ka pa, may ebidensya ako", bigla siya namutla at ipinakita ko yung video (hindi buo), at sinabi nya na wag ako tamang hinala, paranoid lng daw ako..
<pinalampas ko ito dahil hindi naman sapat ang evidence ko at hindi ko tlaga naisip na totoo ang hinala ko, but days passed at palagi iritable na siya sa akin. kahit nagmamasipag na ako na asikasuhin siya, plagi pa rin sya masungit. mahal ko sya kya hindi ko naman naisip na lolokohin nya ako. pero kada gabi, palagi na ako umiiyak sa sama ng loob sa knya>

* yung girl ay araw araw nya kasabay pumasok at umuwi dahil along d way sila sa work. may mga times na pwede kami magkasabay umuwi pero plagi nya sinsabi na sa bahay na lang daw kmi magkita.. napapaisip na ako nun pero hindi ko pa din pinansin

* sep wk1 2012 - i decided to leave the house bec. i cant bear him being too insensitive and hurting my filings. ramdam ko na prang hindi na asawa ang pakikitungo nya sa akin. sobrang sakit na tlga sa akin kaya pinili ko umalis ng bahay pra magbgay ng space at pra marealize nya ang halaga ko at sunduin ako sa bahay ng magulang ko at magkaayos kmi
* days passed pero hndi nya ako sinundo. hurtful ako kaya i decided to talk to him, pero ang malala, he said that his love for me faded and mas gusto daw nya at masaya sya na mag-isa..
* napakaunfair nya dahil siya na nga ang hindi nagtatrato ng tama sa akin, sya pa ang may ganang magdecide na maghiwalay. we can be friends na lang dw. dun lang daw naman siya sa bahay namin na inuupahan, at ako dunsa magulang ko. (wala pa rin ako idea about sa kabit nya this time)
* 2wks after, my parent and i decided that i should come back to our house bec. i have the right of our property. we want to patch up everything kun kaya pa, pero sinabi ko na sa magulang ko yung tungkol sa nakaraang incident ng pagdududa ko sa pambabae nya kaso wala akong matibay na ebidensiya. dual purpose ang pagbalik ko sa bahay, to patch things up or hanap ng ebidensiya if true ang hinala ko.
<important fact: nung bumalik ako, hindi alam ng husband ko na uuwi ako, ang sabi lang kasi ng parent ko kakausapin lang siya, pero ang totoo, kasama na nila ako pra ibalik nga sa bahay>
* on that night, i checked his wallet, and to my surpise, i saw the ID of the kabit in his wallet (i also took video of that). CONFIRMED! why would he keep her ID sa wallet nya if hindi nga important s knya yung girl - HE DID NOT KNOW THAT I KNW THIS
* also on that night, i realized that he purchased a new phone (extra phone nya) - HE DID NOT KNOW THAT I KNW THIS
* on the next morning, i checked our computer and CONFIRMED, they have many pictures together. 2 sets of dates ang nandun. both ang shot ay magkadikit ang ulo nila ang nakangiti, naka-ok ang kanang kamay, at kaliwa ay nakaakbay - HE DID NOT KNOW THAT I KNW THIS (took a video of this also)
* because of all of this, i was able to CONFIRM that he'd been lying to me all along. the reason why he no longer appreciates ALL my efforts is that may babae siya.. kaya pala hindi siya nalungkot nung umalis ako ng haws for 2 wks for space, ay dahil nagbenefit pa sila ng kabit nya..

* OVERALL, I NO LONGER WANT TO STAY WITH THIS GUY ANYMORE. i want to file a case against him and that girl for making my life miserable.. i cant explain how exactly the miseries that i've been through during those days of him being with that girl.. as in, TOTALLY DAMAGED ako right now.. if i can only note all the details of how he hurt me, sasabihin nyo, mahal ka ba talaga nun? he did not show any love na talaga starting may 2012, pero tiniis ko lahat for him.. all i want is a happy family and matiising tao lang ako kaya kami nagtagal, tapos lolokohin pa nya ako..

* paano po ba ang detailed process ng gagawin ko? as in, wala po ako idea kung pano ang unang step.. pano humanap ng attorney, ano kailangan ko gawin? sapat ba ang ebidensiya ko, kasi wala pa talaga akong caught in the act, or sapat na po ba ang evidence ko? PLS GUIDE ME ON HOW TO DO THIS LEGALLY?

[keenobserver]

SORI PO KUNG MAHABA AH.. PLS. PAKITYAGA NA LANG PO BASAHIN.. SOBRANG TORETE NA PO AKO KUNG ANO GAGAWIN KO? BASTA ANG ALAM KO PO, AYOKO NA TALAGA.. AT GUSTO KONG IDAAN ITO SA LEGAL NA PRAAN..

[keenobserver]

at ang kinakagalit ko pa po, grabe ang mga pinapalabas nya na ako ang may problema, kesyo ganito daw ako at ganito, iyon pala, hinahanapan lang tlga nya ako ng butas para may dahilan siyang makipaghiwalay sa akin, iyon pla ay may babae lang siya!

[FerminaDaza]

hi po at welcome sa Espiya.net  ate 

hinga hinga muna po ng malalim...

at ate TEKA, medyo wrong board po kyu, dito po kyu pwede mag post regarding your dilemma po

paki click nyu po ito http://espiya.net/forum/index.php/board,12.0.html

no worries marami po makaka relate at makaka share din po sa syo

[Gat J.P. Rizal]

Hello ate!

Marami pong makakatulong sa inyo dito dahan2x lng po mahina ang kalaban  , hopefully nasa mabuting kalagayan ka ngayon di po kasi biro ang ganitong sitwasyon na naranasan mo. 

[ONEP1ECE.MCMXCIII]

Tama...basa-basa muna ng rules TS(thread-starter)

marami kasi iba members ang pagkaka intindi sa TS > Team-eSpiya

[TobleRONe]

hindi ako attorney pero hanggang hindi nahuhuli sa akto (man and woman doing the deed) hindi enough evidence iyung picture lang na magkasama yung guy at girl na magkatabi ang mukha.

having 2 phones doesn't mean na nangangaliwa na rin.

punta ka sa city hall nyo meron mga public attorney na baka makapagpayo sa iyo.

[ayantot]

Dont worrie maam.. may mas mahaba pang kwento ang nandito na binabasa namin.. 

i second the idea of mr tobleron maam..
i have an idea..

spycam? saan? sa kwarto nyo...  saan doon? duhhh.. 

there will be a time na kakantutin nya yan dun..
and we will be waiting.. 
este, you will be waiting..

[Smitty Werben Man Jensen]

#1 is magtanong ka sa tunay na abogado.

below = my 2cents

Pwede ata pics and text messages pero depende sa bigat ng mairereveal niya.

Concubinage yan, basta gawan mo lang ng paraan na maka-gather ng enough evidence to prove that he's bringing the mistress sa bahay niyong dalawa mismo. Damihan mo para sure. Kahit kapitbahay pasubaybayan mo na nakikita siyang iuuwi mismo yung babae hehe, kaso dapat ready sila magtestify.

or pwede rin ata yan as pscyhcological violence (repeated na pambabae/infedility) sa Violence wgainst Women and Children Act

[gkhan]

The first thing to do when you are in a very emotional state is not to do anything.  Let emotions die down first and that may take a month or two.  It may just be a spur of the moment utterances on his part so just take everything he says with a grain of salt.  Don't show any anger but just be very civil to him and still act the part of the loving wife. Let him think and find out for himself whether what he is doing is for his own good or otherwise. If you sue, you may just be incurring expenses which you may or may not afford also. After two or three months, get back to me and tel me what has transpired and from there, we plan. For the moment, play it by ear.

[katomokII]

Mga co spy. Good evening.  Very sensitive and heart wrenching topic. Masakit na masakit para kay ate ang pinagdadaanan nya. And as Ma'am Fermina mentioned, marami dito ang nakaka relate kay ate. I would just like to ask on behalf of Ate (TS). To all who will be reading her post and will be commenting.  Wag naman nating gawing biro or make comments that are inappropriate. Like I said earlier, Ate is already going through enough without any of us making comments that will rub salt on her wounds.  Just my humble two cents. Ate,  my advice to you is seek professional legal help on this matter.  I'm sure we have co spies here who may know a lawyer or two na expert sa sitwasyon mo. God bless and my family and I will be praying for you.

[bakekong12345678]

Yes. I agree, gather muna ng enough evidence, tangible evidence. Yes, pasok na pasok yan under the law.  evidence na matindi ang kailangan ma'am.

[Lusok]

Ate magkita tau......hindi kita sisingilan ng attorneys fee!

[polsci]

hmmmm.. medyo masalimuot nga yan ms.TS 

based on your confessions. you CANNOT file either legal separation or annulment. that is a sad part of your story. why? you have no valid grounds file legal separation or annulment and your evidences are not tantamount to legal separation or annulment. masakit talaga yan kung tutuusin pero yan ang katotohanan ng batas.

here are the grounds for legal separation, under the family code:


1. Repeated physical violence or grossly abusive conduct directed against the petitioner, a common child, or a child of the petitioner;

2. Physical violence or moral pressure to compel the petitioner to change religious or political affiliation;

3. Attempt of respondent to corrupt or induce the petitioner, a common child, or a child of the petitioner to engage in   prostitution, or connivance in such corruption or inducement;

4. Final judgment sentencing the respondent to imprisonment of more than six years, even if pardoned;

5. Drug addiction or habitual alcoholism of the respondent;

6. Lesbianism or homosexuality of the respondents;

7. Contracting by the respondent of a subsequent bigamous marriage, whether in the Philippines or abroad;

8. Sexual infidelity or perversion;

9. Attempt by the respondent against the life of the petitioner; or

10.Abandonment of petitioner by respondent without justifiable cause for more than one year.

now tell me, san papatak ang asawa mo jan? WALA. eto pa masaklap, one of the ground to deny a petition for legal separation is, "where the aggrieved party has condoned the offense or act complained of" - alam mo na nga na nambababae ang asawa mo pero nauwi ka pa rin sa bahay niyong mag-asawa. that is condonation. even 1hr of cohabitation in the conjugal dwelling, that is tantamount to condonation. parang pinatawad mo na siya sa nagawa niya.

punta tayo sa annulment. what are the grounds?

1. Lack of parental consent - hindi na agad kayo pasok jan

2. Insanity - wala naman baliw sa inyo

3. Fraud - wala naman pinilit na magpakasal kayo

4. Force, intimidation or undue influence - same as no. 3

5. Impotence - tigasin naman si mister

6. STD - muka naman wala

now, san jan papatak si mister? WALA na naman.

magpacounseling nalang kayong mag asawa kesa sa masira ang relasyon niyo. there is no such ground for "lack of love"
yan lang po ang maipapayo ko sa inyo at nga pala para kay ka-espiyang Lusok.

wala ka talagang karapatan para maningil ng attorneys fee kasi ito po ay sa pamamagitan ng award. korte po ang naggagawad nito sa abogado at hindi ang kliyente 

"In case of doubt, the law is always in favor of the marriage"

[IWM]

Ate magkita tau......hindi kita sisingilan ng attorneys fee!

best attorney i know

[leightot]

read my pm.

[darthcapra216]

Sorry to hear you have that issue.

i have the same incident..pero baliktad saakin, ang girl nman yung ganyan..
for no reason whatsoever..

i would say to talk about it, Calm and dont remember past mistake's.
talk about your future.

and of course pray for guidance and strength..

 

[alucardver]

Ate magkita tau......hindi kita sisingilan ng attorneys fee!

O.T.
sir, open po ba yang alok mo para sa lahat ng ka espiya nating need ng tulong mo? ^_^