A competition was recently held to find out the most
embarrassing Moments in people's lives. The following
are the final three place getters:
Third Place:
It was the day before my eighteenth birthday. I was
living at home,but my parents had gone out for the
evening, so I invited my girlfriend over for a
romantic night alone. As we lay in bed after making
love, we heard the telephone ringing downstairs. I
suggested to my girlfriend that I give her a
piggy-back ride to the phone. Since we didn't want to
miss the call, we didn't have time to get dressed.
When we got to the bottom of the stairs, the lights
suddenly came on and a whole crowd of people
yelled"SURPRISE!". My entire family, aunts,uncles,
grandparents, cousins and all of my friends were
standing there ! My girlfriend and I were frozen to
the spot in a state of shock and embarrassment ! for
what seemed like an eternity. Since then, no-one in my
family has planned a surprise party again.
Second Place:
While in line at the bank one afternoon, my toddler
decided to release some pent-up energy and started to
run amuck. I was finally able to grab hold of her
after receiving looks of disgust and annoyance from
other patrons. I told her that if she didn't start
behaving herself right now, she would be punished. To
my horror, she looked me in the eye and said in a
voice just as threatening, "If you don't let me go
right now, I will tell Grandma that I saw you kissing
Daddy's pee-pee(dick) last night!". The silence was
deafening after this enlightening exchange. Even the
tellers stopped what they were doing ! I mustered the
last of my dignity and walked out of the bank with my
daughter in tow. The last thing that I heard as the
door closed behind me was the scream of laughter.
And the Winner Is.....
This one actually happened at Harvard University in
October last year.
In a biology class, the professor was discussing the
high glucose levels found in semen. A young female
(freshman), raised her hand and asked,"If I understand
what you are saying, there is a lot of glucose in male
semen, as in sugar?"
"That's correct," responded the professor, going on to
add much statistical data. Raising her hand again, the
sweet young thing asked, "Then why doesn't it taste sweet?".
After a stunned silence, the whole class burst out
laughing, the poor girl turned bright red and as she
realized exactly what she had inadvertently said (or
rather implied), she picked up her books without a
word and walked out of the class, and never returned.
However, as she was going out of the door, the
professor's reply was a classic. Totally
straight-faced, he answered her question, "It doesn't
taste sweet because the taste-buds for sweetness are
on the tip of your tongue and not in the back of your throat."
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