Depressed since my high school senior year. It's like a part of my system now. Still trying to fight it even I admitted to myself that I'm a failure to my family (no suicidal tendencies though) And it's true, it causes short term memory on daily basis. Got selective memory too. I only remember what I want and the worst, embarrassing, sad moments of my life. I only recall a few happy moments. Well I'm the best when it comes to memorization before but now every time i try to recall something even if it's just a while ago, i experience blurry visions in my head. Sometimes when I'm trying hard to recall it, it's like I'm in a library and trying to flip a lot of books, finding the answer to my question then i suddenly i feel electrocuted when I got my answer. It's my fault if I lead the life of being depress but I hope one day I'll make out of this pandora's box before I suffer from early alzheimer or whatever disease I can get from it.
Depressed since my high school senior year. It's like a part of my system now. Still trying to fight it even I admitted to myself that I'm a failure to my family (no suicidal tendencies though) And it's true, it causes short term memory on daily basis. Got selective memory too. I only remember what I want and the worst, embarrassing, sad moments of my life. I only recall a few happy moments. Well I'm the best when it comes to memorization before but now every time i try to recall something even if it's just a while ago, i experience blurry visions in my head. Sometimes when I'm trying hard to recall it, it's like I'm in a library and trying to flip a lot of books, finding the answer to my question then i suddenly i feel electrocuted when I got my answer. It's my fault if I lead the life of being depress but I hope one day I'll make out of this pandora's box before I suffer from early alzheimer or whatever disease I can get from it.
I only remember what I want and the worst, embarrassing, sad moments of my life. I only recall a few happy moments.
well, parehas tyu bro ::laffman
I'm doing the work/my inner work and kinda HELP me (I'm still a work in progress) so i turn my "it's my fault" to "I can suck and I can be awesome" my choice...but I cannot experience both positive & negative emotion AT THE SAME TIME. If I try to hold both at the same time, I CAN'T.Then I can't relax.
What works for me though, is learning to acknowledge/accept how i feel and *allow it.Then I started to be more loving and kinder to myself( help me to move and NOT wallow for months,years to my own suckery) To be able to recognize the eff it moment and slow down. The more i eff up the more i pampered myself.Then i'm back to awesomeness :D (sounds so easy to say but it really takes *practice and that's how i change or program or stimulate or rewired my own brain neurons) ;D
It's ok to remember or not remember,what's important is the *meaning you give to your story.What happens when we keep on recalling the past, we also keep giving a *new meaning to it.That is the tricky part.Any stories you tell repeatedly will grow more powerful.
When I recall stories that had happened many years ago and then I'm stuck and give more awful meaning to it.ugh.It didn't work well for me, but as soon as I realized that my *memory/memories is just a collections/re-collection of what *I think happened-in short It's just me and everything is not sh*t-that kinda help. ;) I begin to recall stories that had happened and *blame effectively:
1.Story
2.who I blame?
3.why do I blame them?
4.what do I blame them for?
Our old story doesn't really make sense if we blame someone(you just giving it power) You just have to figure out who you blame--AND START TO BLAME THEM BETTER. e.g. If that didn't happened_______ i wouldn't realized that ____(I'm really awesome)
But the thing is, even though depression is something that we can't really control, how we deal with it is still within our abilities and our choosing. Aside from getting professional help when and where it's needed, we also need to take stock of ourselves and come to grips with the things that make us depressed. Some of those things might still be resolvable; go resolve them as best and as definitively as possible. That way, you get closure, if nothing else.
If only people know what it's like to suffer from depression, they won't berate us as cowards who can't deal with a "mind-over-matter-cheapskate" like it's easy as math problem to solve. They won't know that it is uncontrollable. It's like a thief in the night that will steal away your happiness. In tagalog, "para kang binagsakan ng langit at lupa" meaning you're in hell and need to deal with this and fight with it that could go through years. Pero of course, some are strong like us who loves to head on and battle our depression. And yes it is resolvable.
"Our initial research hypothesis was that trained muscle would produce a substance with beneficial effects on the brain," says Jorge Ruas, principal investigator at the Department of Physiology and Pharmacology, Karolinska Institutet.
"We actually found the opposite: well-trained muscle produces an enzyme that purges the body of harmful substances. So in this context the muscle's function is reminiscent of that of the kidney or the liver."
yeah, work that arse off ! try to danz like a demented duck in your undies instead ;D
Ducks can suffer from dementia? ;D laffman::
HAHA whatevs werks seigneur... it works for me (dancing like a crazy duck) ::laffman
you can always purchase a hand puppet of a rat to serve as your partner. laffman:: ::lmao ::flowers
noted seigneur :D or else me & our friend 'kokomo' might as well become a ventriloquist beauties?! LOL